Christian Friendships - Part I

The Christian discovers that, while he has fellowship with all his brothers and sisters in Christ, he has special friendships with only some of them. It is not always easy to say why such friendships between some Christians develop or why potential friendships with others come to nothing. But it is a fact of observation and experience which must ultimately have its explanation in the mystery of God's providence. Fellowhip in a general sense exists among all who are born of God. But that special delight which friends find in each other's company is smoething which goes beyond this. Fellowship is there because of the grace which is enjoyed in common. But friendships occur almost mysteriously and yet not without explanation, was we shall see. No doubt in heaven, when grace becomes glory, this imperfect state of our relationships will improve so that all will be equally the friend of each. But it is not so now and no act of will can now make it so, it would seem.

The best of God's servants have had special friends and their names are wreathed together and intertwined in the pages of Scripture. Moses and Joshua, David and Jonathan, Daniel and his friends, Peter and John, Paul and Timothy - the belonged together on earth and their names come easily to our memory in pairs or groups. Even the Lord Jesus Christ had his special relationships with his own disciples. Out of the twelve, three were specially intimate: Peter, James and John. out of these three, one was unique. Only John was 'the disciple whom Jesus loved', in the relationship of a friend par excellence. It appears clear therefore that we ought not, as Christians, to be surprised to find that we have closer relations with some of God's people than with others. This must not lead us to be dismissive of brothers who are not in our intimate circle of friends. But it reassures us that there is no sin in the Christian's having closer ties with some rather than with other belivers.

Christian friendships are no doubt ordained to draw forth from us the highest powers of our soul and so to lead to our greatest usefulness and sactification. It is not hard to see how this comes about. most friendships, if not all, consist of a bond of affection between one who is more talented, or else more spiritually advanced, and another who is less so. Within this relationship there is a mutually felt, even if tacit, recognition of the need for grace and forebearance. The gifted brother must show his brotherliness by generous, but concealed, condescension, and the less-gifted brother must advance the friendship by mortifying his envy. Thus pride is weakened in the one and jealousy in the other. Both are strengthened in their graces and as a result 'iron sharpeneth iron'.

(to be continued)

from The Thought of God by Maurice Roberts